The Poisonous Question
by Darkwing333
Summary: This is my first LOST fanfic so please be kind. Reviews are welcome! All about Kate with a little bit of Sawyer thrown in. Enjoy!
1. Drunken Words

This is my first LOST fanfic, so please be kind. Reviews are welcome. I hope everybody enjoys my fantasy. This was actually based on a dream I had so if it is a little strange, well then it's a little strange. Enjoy;)

**The Poisonous Question**

Slipping silently through the trees she ran, ran as fast and hard as she could. 'How could he do that?' Kate thought to herself. 'I knew I couldn't trust anyone, but I thought Jack was different. He said "everyone should be able to start over." And foolishly enough Kate had believed him, foolish for thinking that her past could be that, the past. Stay buried. Lost, just like the survivors were on this island. Lost. Hopelessly, helplessly lost. On the other hand, being lost might not be so bad. At least she wouldn't be locked up in some prison rotting away her youthful years.

Youth, now that was another matter. Kate's youth had been stolen a long time ago…but that's not the problem. 'Jack, you're the problem.' "Errr!" A growl of frustration escaped Kate as she kept replaying the scene over and over again in her head.

After the golf success, Hurley wanted to keep up the relax-and-have-some-fun mood, so he searched for more ideas. Soon he, Charlie, Michael and two of the others had found some grapes growing on a tangle of vines out in the jungle. That's the precise moment the idea emerged. "Whine." Someone had said. "What?" The others had asked. "Let's make some." The first person had replied. They thought it might be possible, so for the next week or so Hurley, Charlie, Michael and the two others had secretly been busy brewing an alcoholic beverage. The good thing is that it worked. Everyone enjoyed the whine one day as a surprise after another successful golf tournament.

The bad thing is…that it worked too well. So, there they all were relaxing and having a grand ol' time. Then someone got the brilliant idea of sharing, a very drunk someone, sharing secrets from the past. Just little things but as the night grew longer those things grew bigger as people got drunker, especially Sawyer who consumed endless bottles of the beverage. Kate remembered thinking, 'Boy, he's going to have a whole new kind of hang-over tomorrow.' That's the moment Jack popped the question.

That's when Jack betrayed Kate. She could hear it so clearly. "So, Kate, why _were_ you with the marshal on the plane?" It was obvious that he was drunk, and probably wouldn't remember the conversation in the morning. "So, Kate, why _were_ you with the marshal on the plane?" Over and over again his accusatory voice echoed through her head.

Now slowing to a decent pace, Kate tried to catch her breath. 'Had anyone else heard the question?' Kate thought. The question scared her but the answer scared her even more. Kate didn't know the answer though since the shock of Jack asking the question had caused her to become deaf in an instant, as if the words were somehow poisonous.

Kate had left too quickly; maybe anyone that was watching would think it was an admission of guilt. 'Maybe it was, who knows. Yes, that's it. I'm guilty. The guiltiest that they come.' Kate thought sarcastically to herself.

Kate's gasping breathes from running had slowed and had now turned into silent sobs as Kate began to realize that she had tears streaming down her face. Lifting a hand she angrily swiped the tears away, furious with herself that she could be so weak. 'No thanks to you, _Jack_…you were too drunk.'

"Ha." Kate's voice reverberated thought the still forest. 'Serves him right to get a killer hang-over in the morning.' "Maybe no one even saw mw leave?"

"Fat chance of that happenin'. Talking to yourself now are we," Sawyer appeared from behind some trees. "And they say I got problems." Chuckling to himself Sawyer makes his way over to Kate.

Standing there dumbstruck Kate struggles to find the words. Any words, but all she could think of was the ten million dollar question screaming through her head like a freight train. 'Had he heard Jack?'

"Freckles, you gonna say something?" Sounding a little concerned, "Freckles-"

Finally finding her voice Kate responds trying to sound annoyed. "-Sawyer, what do you want?"

"Well, well, well, that's the question of the day ain't it." Licking his lips Sawyer went on. "Seems to recall you askin' me that question before. What. Do. I. Want."

Before he could go any further, "Sawyer, why are you here?" Kate rephrased the question, true annoyance in her voice this time.

"Saw you run off like a bat outta hell, thought maybe since Jacko , Captain Falafel and the others were too drunk to notice, that I'd check you out…" Looks Kate up and down.

"Sawyer!"

"…Make sure you're alright. Seems to me you are." Smirks at Kate.

Kate's mind raced on just barely noticing Sawyers smirk. 'Jack hadn't noticed her leave? No one had?' Instead of the relief Kate had anticipated in hearing this news, a sinking hopelessness threatened to weigh her down. He hadn't even noticed. She had run off for nothing.

Turning away, Kate continued her journey to the beach. Now at a slower rate, feeling the heaviness of Jack's words on her. 'And he'll never know how he hurt me… because _he_ was too drunk!' Kate's thoughts ebbed and subsided like the licking of angry waves on the shore.

"…a sip?" Realizing that Sawyer was talking to her, she only caught the last words to the question. Looking at him questioningly, he asked again.

"You want a sip?" Sawyer held out the airline bottle filled with the alcoholic drink.

"No, thanks," Kate eyed Sawyer suspiciously. "Think I'll pass." Kate hadn't had any earlier either, not liking the taste of homemade whine.

"Suit yourself." Taking another swig from the bottle Sawyer watched Kate from above the rim.

All of a sudden something dawned on Kate, 'why wasn't he acting drunk?' He drank tones at the gathering earlier, and was still drinking now.

As Sawyer walked behind her, Kate stopped suddenly causing Sawyer to crash into her. Ignoring his protests Kate inhaled deeply. It wasn't there. He didn't smell of the alcohol. Not a trace. Just a quickly as she had stopped, Kate grabbed the bottle and took a drink.

Only half listening to Sawyers words of surprise, "…all you had to do was ask." One word popped into her head and she started to laugh.

"Ice tea?!" Kate was sitting down now holding her sides full out laughing. "You were drinking," Tries to gain control of herself but fails, "Ice tea?"

At least Sawyer had the dignity to look slightly embarrassed.

"All that time you were sitting there drinking…it was ice tea?" By now Kate had nearly gained control of herself but the words 'ice tea' caused her to double over in laughter again. Giggles really, actually feeling like she was is grade five again laughing with her girlfriends, then thinking that she probably looked like she was in grade five caused Kate to lose control once more.

Quit unexpectedly Kate's hysterical laughter turned into sobs that racked her body as hard as the laughter had moments earlier. Leaning against a tree trunk Kate turned away and covered her face.

Watching is bewilderment, Sawyer didn't know how to respond to Kate's behavior that could only be described as…crazy? First with the laughter and now with the tears, Sawyer started to feel a little bit of panic rise in him. 'This is not what I had come for.' Now he knew something was up. But what was he supposed to do about it. 'Where's the damn doc when you need him?' Sawyer thought fiercely. 'Never mind, screw him, docs the problem in the first place.'

Sawyer cautiously moved closer to Kate and tenderly touched her shoulder. "Kate?" 'What was he supposed to do. He'd never seen Kate break down like this before. She always tried to be so tough.'

"Sawyer, go away!"

Her voice sounded defensive, she probably never did break down like this. 'Great, and I just gotta be the first, don't I.' He thought sarcastically to himself. 'Should he go?' Sawyer eyed Kate closely, her bright green eyes were red rimmed and her bottom lip trembled. She was gaining control of herself though, and had started to move a way from him.

She moved fast, he had to jog to keep up with her. "Damn it, Freckles…Kate!" He ran in front of her and put his hands on her shoulders to stop her from moving any further.

"Kate, what the hell just happened?" Sawyer looked wary of her but the concern shown through.

Trying to twist out of his grasp but failing, Kate had no option but to look into Sawyers caring eyes. 'Caring??' Kate did a double take and was amazed. Could it be… could it be that Sawyer …cared? This was not what she expected from Sawyer. In a way it made everything worse. Not only had she made a fool of herself in front of him, but she was starting not to completely despise him.

"I'm fine." Kate lied, her voice said it, her face said it, her eyes said it and Sawyer knew it.

You don't look fine to me." Sawyer said, his face moving closer to Kate's.

Kate's heart thudded in her chest. She could smell him; the sweet smell of ice tea and sweat mingling together. 'Where did he get the ice tea anyways.' Her eyes connected with his and for an instant she saw the vulnerability and fear there. He shared her pain. 'He knew.' Kate's heart that had been pounding in her chest stopped short and she couldn't catch her breath. 'I can't believe it.' Kate's thoughts raged on, 'He knew, he knows.'

Pulling away from Sawyer she quickly started again her journey to get to the beach. Then Sawyer spoke up.

"I told you the doc would end up hurting you." Sawyers voice reached out and slapped her.

Spinning on her heals, Kate spun around and could feel herself snap, "You have no idea what I'm feeling." Her voice held a threatening tone and she went on before Sawyer could respond, "You don't have a clue. You couldn't even imagine, either. You put on this arrogant act and pretend you know everything. Well, news flash Sawyer, you don't!" Glaring at Sawyer, Kate spun back around and was off disappearing through the trees so quickly, if you blinked you would have missed it.

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Standing there stunned, Sawyer starts to retreat. Obviously she didn't want him around. 'Hell, she don't even like me.'

Something gnawed at the back of Sawyer conscience as he turned away to leave. Could he really leave her out here when she was acting so irrational? Could he stand himself if something happened to her? Before Sawyer knew what he was doing, he had turned around and was heading in Kate's direction. "Aw hell."

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Kate stopped as she neared the beach. The beach hadn't actually been her destination, but where else was there to go. The caves weren't that preferable either. She didn't want to see anyone or be forced to make small talk with one of the other survivors.

There was only one person she wanted to be with but she had managed to drive him away too. She was good at that. Keeping the walls up so high and thick that it would take an army to get through. 'Why do I always do this? At least, when Sawyer was here I wasn't alone. It's not like he was judging me.'

Actually he was being sort of nice. Kate just realized it now as she sat on a fallen tree and took her pack off. A feeling of guilt swept over her. He had been trying to help her and she had thrown it in his face. True his last remark was uncalled for, but what could you expect; he was still Sawyer after all.

He even knew about the question Jack had asked her, that she was sure of. Kate wasn't sure how much more he knew or thought he knew, but this much she knew. He hadn't asked her about it or thrown it in her face... Jack had done both.

Grabbing for a bottle of water out of her pack and she brought the bottle out of her bag. It was empty. 'Damn!' Of course she had forgotten to refill her bottles of water. Why would she do _that_, with all the other stupid things she was doing these days? Chucking the empty bottle back in her pack, she ran her hands through her long hair, playing with the ends and got lost in the quickly crumbling world of her mind.

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Sawyer saw her before she saw him. She was sitting on a log playing with her hair. She always seemed to be playing with her hair when she was upset. Which come to think of it was quit often. Sawyer saw her chuck the empty bottle into her backpack. 'Well, maybe now I can giver her something she wants.' Sawyer thought to himself. Gathering his courage he walked over to where Kate sat brooding.

"Brought you some water." Was all he said.

Startled Kate looked up in shock. She hadn't heard him come…again. "You should really start wearing a bell." Kate said a small smile twitching at her lips.

The corners of Sawyer's mouth turned up in a smirk and he held out the bottle of water. "Thought you might be thirsty." He saw the surprise then the gratitude in her eyes as she hesitated then reached for the bottle.

Sitting down beside her, sawyer waited for her to finish.

Kate finished drinking and glanced over at Sawyer. Why was he being so nice? "I'm sorry for yelling at you earlier." Kate mumbled. At first Kate thought he didn't hear her, then she heard him.

"You had a right to be angry. I was being a jerk."

Kate couldn't believe her ears. Sure, she had apologized but she hadn't expected any sort of response, especially one as nice as that. All of a sudden everything didn't seem so overwhelming. Maybe she would survive the next twelve hours or twenty-four or forty-eight.

"So you liked that answer did you." Sawyer's question came out of nowhere, "At least I got you smiling again. You was starting to worry me Freckles." Sawyer drawled the last word sending shivers up and down Kate's spine.

Sitting there next to Sawyer sharing a bottle of water was exactly what Kate needed. The traumas of earlier that evening seemed far away for a moment. Sawyer had come back, he hadn't left, and he hadn't betrayed her. He was predictable; a bad boy by nature, a jerk at times, but right now having him next to Kate was all she needed.

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Hope everyone enjoyed. I am thinking of writing a second chapter. So review and i will do that.


	2. Out of the Loop

**Disclaimer:** I don't own Lost, I just think I do sometimes...really, it's rather confusing...

**Author's Note:** Thanks so much to the kind and considerate people who took the time to give me reviews. Thank you. I am sorry it took so long to post the next chapter.

**Shannon Michelle:** I am so happy that you loved my first chapter. I am in the process of writing the third chapter, i think you will like it, but for now here is the second one. Enjoy and tell me how you liked it!!

**Xedra:** I do try with Sawyer. It just comes naturally. Hope you like the next chapter.

**Elizabeth5:** I do love Sawyer and Kate, too. They are so sweet although, i have started another story that circles around Kate and Jack. I sit on the fence and go back and forth between K/S and K/J....

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**Chapter 2**

The evening twilight had turned into a dark night with the first stars starting to appear. Kate and Sawyer headed to the beach and lit a fire a little ways away from the other survivors. Not much talking was done and Kate was glad for that. Soon Kate and Sawyer split up to go to their respective sleeping areas.

Kate settled down near the fire and pulled the blanket up to her chin. It wasn't the cold that had Kate shivering, but memories of earlier that evening. Glancing over to where Sawyer lay in his makeshift tent, Kate snuggled down as the best she could and tried to sleep. Trying to sleep wasn't the hard part, it was what came once sleep took over…

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_Panic coursed through Kate like a raging river. She was hiding in the jungle in the dark. The monster wasn't what she was afraid of. Yells came from ahead. Angry voices floated past her head. Not being able to tell what direction they came from, Kate sat still, her breath catching in her chest._

_A knife glinted in the moonlight. Locke! Jumping up Kate ran as fast as her legs could carry her. Tripping over an object on the ground, Kate went sprawling then smacked into something solid…a person._

_Looking up Kate saw Jack looking back at her, an evil grin lit up his face as he pulled a pair of handcuffs out of his pocket. _

_Kate tried to run, but her legs wouldn't work. She felt a hand on her shoulder and people appeared behind Jack from out of the mist. They started to chant. "Kate, Kate, Kate…"_

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"Kate. Kate? Kate!" Someone was calling and shaking her roughly, "Kate." Jerking upright, Kate's head slammed into something hard. Leaning back down Kate rubbed her head and saw white spots dance before her. Feeling lightheaded, 'Great. Now I'll have a concussion and someone will run for the doc, who has a hangover and can't do anything anyways.' Kate thought negatively to herself. Slowly she sat up and saw Sawyer holding his head as well.

Looking around Kate realized that it had just been a dream. 'A horrible nightmare, but why was Sawyer over here shaking me awake?'

"Are you okay?" Kate's voice sounded strange in the darkness and her throat hurt.

"Okay? Sure sweetheart, I get knocked in the head in the middle of the damn night all the time." Sawyer sarcastically remarked.

"Well, are you?" Kate asked, her voice holding a hint of annoyance this time.

"Ya…sure, fine. No point crying over spilt milk."

Kate looked around, 'Why were there so many people awake?' She looked at her watch. '3 am.' Usually people were asleep at this time, with no electricity on the island; there wasn't much point in staying up late.

"Something you want to share?" Sawyer's voice caused Kate to turn in his direction.

Rubbing her head, "What are you talking about Sawyer?" Not having much patience, Kate rubbed her eyes and reached for her pack, she still had the bottle of water that Sawyer had given her earlier.

Sawyer was eyeing her strangely and Kate got a sinking feeling in her stomach. When Sawyer started to speak, Kate's stomach sank even further, "Well, you was a little restless is all." Seems to consider something. "Maybe a little more than a little."

Kate looked around again. Most everyone had gone back to sleep. 'Oh-no, what did I miss.' All of a sudden Kate's mind slammed to a halt.

'The nightmare.' She had been having a nightmare… 'What did I do?'

Seeming to read her thoughts, Sawyer answered the question. "Woke up 'cause you was tossing n' turnin' and yellin' like the damn devil himself was after you." Going on, "Tried to wake you…unfortunately it worked." Sawyer said rubbing his head again.

'Great. Just great.' The barrier broke and a flood of thought bombarded Kate. 'Tossing and turning. Yelling. What did I say?! Guess that's why my throat hurts.' Kate thought sarcastically. 'What did I say? What did I say? What did I say? Maybe no one understood what I was saying? Maybe it really was just nonsense yelling? Maybe…'

Kate threw a nervous look at Sawyer, than looked back at her hands in her lap. "Did…I…say…anything?" Kate asked quietly.

"Say anything? Come to think of it, ya." Sawyer stopped and Kate gave him a questioning look. "Patience, Freckles…as I was sayin', you was talking. Sounded scared too. Something about dear ole' Jack. Dunno what about but sounded like he was out to get ya or something, from the way you was screaming." Sawyer paused seeing the horror on Kate's face. "He wasn't was he?"

'Out to get me.' Kate thought, 'Not likely. More like out to capture me and feed me to the monster in the jungle as a sacrifice, judging by the look on his face.' "I don't remember." Kate lied. "It was just some stupid dream."

'Yeah-right!' Sawyer's face screamed out, but he kept the words to himself. "If you say so Freckles. I'm off to sleep some more then. That is if you don't get the urge to scream some more."

Kate watched him saunter back to his tent. Rolling over so he couldn't see her face in the darkness, Kate tried to sleep. 'It was just a dream. It's not real. Jack wouldn't really do that?!' An uncertainly washed over Kate.

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-6 am that morning-

Unable to fall back to sleep, Kate had gotten up before the others and had walked quit a ways down the beach wanting a little space to herself. Two or three miles. "Guess I got carried away with wanted 'a little space'." Kate spoke out loud to herself. On the horizon the early morning haze had faded and the bright sun told her it was going to be another scortching day. 'How can it not be? We are somewhere around the equator.' Kate guessed. 'I always wanted to go to Hawaii.' Kate's thoughts were laced with sarcasms. She looked up and spoke as if to a god. "But I meant a vacation." Plopping down on the beach Kate stared out to the sea.

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Back at the Beachville Sawyer awoke slowly rolling over so he could see out of the tent to where Kate slept. He liked to keep an eye on her, but Kate wasn't there. 'Where was she? Sawyer barely finished the thought before he saw the site before him. Sawyer's mind took a moment to process what was going on around him.

The camp around him was in a flurry of motion, survivors running around grabbing bags and suitcases and hastily throwing them onto higher ground.

"What the hell…?" Sawyer's voice was lost in the commotion.

Getting up Sawyer stepped out of the tent and saw the problem. The tide was rushing in so quickly that no one had time to move their few precious possessions out of it's path, before they got swept away. Seeing this and how fast the tide was moving towards his encampment, Sawyer grabbed some of his things and began to frantically move it away from the greedy hands of the sea.

Amidst the rushing Sawyer saw Kate's belongings on the shore, much closer than his, they were about to be sucked out to sea.

"Damn, where is that women!" Sawyer threw the last of his belongings onto safer ground and rushed back to grab Kate's few belongings; getting very soaked in the process.

"Kate, when you get back, you are so going to pay for this." Muttering to himself Sawyer walked back to his stuff and dropped Kate's suitcases next to his. A piece of paper floated out of a jean pocket and landed itself squarely at Sawyer's feet.

'Well, I wasn't gonna snoop, but this is too much.' Looking around furtively Sawyer picked up the folded piece of paper and held it in his hands. 'I know I shouldn't…sort of. Kate's just so mysterious.' He rationalized, taking another look around Sawyer slowly unfolded the paper and was shocked by what he saw.

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Trudging back to the beach Kate heard the commotion before she saw it. Quickening her pace Kate sped around the bend and saw the tide had far surpassed its usual boundaries. Questions popped into her head pushing all else out of its way.

"What the hell?" 'Great!' Kate thought. 'The tides doing funky thing and I am starting to sound like Sawyer.' Glancing around Kate saw Michael and Walt dragging a load of luggage past Kate.

"What's going on?" Kate asked Michael.

Michael glanced at Kate in surprise. "Where've you been? The tides been coming in all morning." Michael grunted as he continued on, "Most of the beach should be underwater by evening. Better grab your stuff before it's washed away."

Michael moved on and Kate stood dumbfounded, 'Her stuff…?' A person bumbed into Kate snapping her out of her trance.

"My stuff!" Rushing to where her stuff had once was, Kate was up to her knees in water before she realized it was gone. Jumping out of the way from an oncoming wave, Kate's mind raced. 'My stuff, my suitcases. It's the only stuff I own in the world.' Starting to feel frantic now Kate hurriedly walked to where a pile of luggage lay. 'Maybe somebody grabbed it.' Her mind rationalized.

"Damn it." Tears started to sting her eyes as she lifted the last suitcase to find it wasn't hers. ' Now I have nothing.' A voice screamed in her head. 'You have nothing, Kate. This is what you deserve, this is your punishment.'

"No." A desperate voice escaped. "Please no." Whispering, Kate stood up and scanned the crowd.

'You have nothing, Kate. You may have survived the crash, but you will suffer none the less.' The voice in her head sounded suspiciously like the marshals. Then another voice screamed back, 'No, I am free!' The marshals voice spoke back again, 'You don't look free to me.'

A tap on the shoulder caused Kate to jump nearly a foot in the air. Turning she saw Sawyer.

"Whow-wee, a little jumpy now are we."

Kate kept silent knowing anything she said would just encourage him more.

"We playing the silent game now are we." Sawyer looked at Kate with a cocky grin. His face suddenly changed. "Got something for you."

Kate looked at Sawyer in surprise. "What are you talking about?" Kate looked at Sawyer in suspiciously. "I'm really busy. Need to find…something."

"I know." Was all Sawyer said before he walked away, knowing Kate would follow, if not out of curiosity but because of his irresistible charm. 'Oh-yeah, my irresistible charm!' A smile graced Sawyers lips and he shook his head.

He half-turned and wasn't surprised to see Kate following.

Entering his newly reconstructed and relocated tent, Sawyer sat down, taking much time in making himself comfortable.

Ten seconds later Kate entered the tent. Seeing Sawyer sitting comfortably a condescending smirk on his face, Kate's impatience grew. Placing her hands on her hips she spat, "Well."

"Patience, patience." Sawyer teased, wagging his finger.

Kate glared daggers as Sawyer reached over and plucked Kate's suitcase out of his own heaping pile.

Kate's jaw dropped. 'Sawyer, of course _Sawyer_ would have it. The packrat.' She almost laughed at her own stupidity. How could she have forgotten Sawyer?

A southern drawl interrupted her thoughts, "I take it you're glad I saved your stuff from being _sucked_ out to sea." Pointing at Kate, "You're smiling."

Kate's grin grew wider as she reached for her suitcase. "You rescued my stuff?"

"Rescuing, I dunno, more like salvaging. Hell, take a look around." Waving his arm in a broad ark at the large pile of suitcases and 'salvaged' stuff.

Kate grasped her suitcase with both hands and sat down beside Sawyer. "Thanks." Kate slowly moved her eyes to meet Sawyer's eyes. An understanding passed between them as green eyes met blue. Starting to relax, Kate sighed. 'Perhaps, I'm not being punished. I haven't lost everything.' A comfortable silence settled in the tent and for once Sawyer didn't spoil it with sarcastic remarks.

All of a sudden the moment was dashed as Jack burst into the tent…

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To be continued… Muh ha ha ha!!! So the next chapter should be up by next Friday. No promises though. I am so bad with exact dates, but I will try to update soon. DON'T' FORGET TO **REVIEW**!!!!!! Any little comment on how you like it or advice would be nice. I am always trying to write better. Thanx to all of you that DO review…no pressure… :) 


	3. Fact: Guys are Jerks

**Author's Note:** I wrote this chapter a while ago when i was severly piss off at Jack for being so mean to Kate. So if it makes absolutely not freaking sense, that would be why. As of now i really do love Jack, besides the fact that he is a hottie, have you seen his tatoo?? So This is the last chapter of this truely odd story that came out of a dream, and it's just gotten more weird and more bizarre from then. So here it is, don't hate it too much. ;)

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**Chapter 3: Fact: Guys are Jerks**

_Dear Diary,_

Turns out all he wanted was some asprin. ASPRIN! Can you believe it? Some damn, freaking, stupid, bloody, ASPRIN!! Okay so I stole the 'bloody' from Charlie, but it looks good on paper.

Tapping her pen to the paper, Kate looked down at her writing skeptically. "Hmm, now I am trying to get into the habit of; talking to a book." Click, click, click, went Kate's pen as she fiddled with it. Trying a little more, Kate began to write.

He didn't even say anything to me. Just went up to Sawyer and said, "What do you want for some asprin?" Can you believe it? No 'Hi, Kate.' or 'How are you?' or 'Sorry for being an ass.' Or 'By the way I'll jump off a cliff next time I open my big, Fat, UGLY mouth to say ANYTHING about your past! Oh and sorry again.' Ha! As if!

'Okay so maybe this is a little fun.' Click, click, click went the pen. 'Big, bad, Kate gets to insult and put down little itty-bitty Jackass on a piece of paper. Big whoop!' She thought sarcastically. 'Not like it will change anything.'

'But maybe I will just write one more teeny-tiny paragraph.'

And then after Jack is pushed…err…jumps off the cliff, my life will be totally, completely and utterly free of the past. Nobody else knows anything. DIE JACK! DIE! But somehow I don't think it will be that easy to kill off the doctor and have nobody notice. Besides last time I Killed it wasn't in cold blood. It just happened. Could I really do it again? In cold blood?

"Okay, I think that is enough for today." Closing the book, Kate held it shut as if doing so would trap all the thoughts she had written down inside, so that they couldn't escape and come to life.

"I don't know how Claire does it. Writing in a diary. Haven't done this since tenth grade when…" But she couldn't say the words out loud. They hurt too much. 'When…' She tried to think them instead, but it seemed as if her brain hit a brick wall and skipped to the next question, of not when but why. 'How could he do that?'

"Talking about me?" Claire teased. She waddled over to Kate.

Quickly looking up Kate blushed. "Sorry."

"Don't be." Claire sat down heavily on the log next to Kate. "Hope you said nice things." Claire smiled at Kate and got a smile in response.

"Sometimes it helps."

"What does?" Kate looked at Claire, she had a mystic look, as if she was going to go all spacey. "Claire?"

"It helps to talk to yourself or write it down sometimes." Claire looked intently at Kate. "When life gets too confusing, too hard to sort out, I write it down." She looked at her big belly and rubbed it. "I mean look at me, I'm pregnant."

Kate chuckled, "Yeah, I noticed."

"I'm also on an island without the chance of being rescued."

Kate tried to object, "We might still—"

"—Kate, you know we won't get rescued." She looked away almost guiltily. "I hear people talking, and they've heard you and other the other people that went on the hike talking." Claire looked into Kate's eyes, "We're not going to be rescued and you know it."

They both looked away and said nothing for a few moments. Kate was thinking furiously about how careless the others had been to let word get out.

"Well, I'm not pregnant, so why would I need to write in some diary?" Kate questioned.

"Sometimes the past can catch up to us even on a deserted island." Claire gave Kate a knowing look, then smiled and grabbed Kate's hand. "Help me up, I need to pee."

Both girls giggled, Kate helped Claire up. "If you wait a minute, I'll walk back with you to the caves."

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So maybe everything was going okay, for a while. Just a moment in time, just an instant in the great length of history. Truly if you looked at it that way it was no time at all. Just here and then gone.

Kate had been out with Claire, talking about girly stuff, not what she usually did. But Claire had a way of drawing people into that sort of stuff, just having fun and forgetting they were on an island, with people who didn't really give a crap and tried to pretend they were your friends so they could get things from you.

Nope, Claire helped forget that for a little while. She helped Kate sort out a few things, too.

Like…

Guys are jerks. They have ya, they leave ya and on top of it all they talk about you as a conquest. Hmmm, maybe she had some personal feelings on the matter.

Jack was a jerk and that was all there was to it.

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The End 

Told ya, just plain strange. Review if it tickles your fancy!


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